#WheelerNovel has been out for a while now and yet I’m still refining the book blurb. Recently, the importance of “keywords” and “SEO searchability” have left my brain swimming in confusion and I was gently encouraged to rewrite it. (I have little doubt it will change again because I absolutely must make things that much harder for myself.)
The only good thing is I haven’t sold many copies (that’s a whole other issue) and by golly, I’m self-published. I do what I want!
Anyway, before I spend the time to update the blurb all over the universe, thanks to Draft2Digital, I ask you, my 203 followers, for your opinion.
Exhibit A. The OLD one.
American pro cyclist Loren Mackenzie rarely shows emotion in the heat of competition; she inspires her team with quiet strength and determination. What no one knows is her mask of cool confidence hides a past filled with pain and darkness.
A change in management of Loren’s cycling team brings her face to face with a life she thought she left behind, adding to the pressures of leadership and competition. When a chance meeting with an A-list celebrity quickly develops into a whirlwind romance, the cameras of the tabloid-media focus on Loren’s life, soon revealing the cracks in her facade. The affair also exposes a menacing rival, threatening not only her chances in the World Championship but also her life.
When love and obsession collide, Loren stands in the center of the storm. Can she find the courage to defeat her inner demons, or will her fear and shame consume her?
Exhibit B. The NEW one – or the most recent rewrite.
American pro cyclist Loren Mackenzie has learned to hide her emotions behind a mask of cool confidence. In the beginning, cycling was a means to escape; to overcome the pain in her heart and mind with the burn of her muscles. Leaving her past behind for a new life in the European peloton, her focus becomes her team and leading them through the highs and lows of intense competition.
A change in management of her cycling team forces Loren to confront a turbulent relationship she had hoped was long dead. But, then a chance meeting with an A-list celebrity quickly develops into a whirlwind romance, the affair exposes her to a threat that not only puts her chances in the World Championship in jeopardy but also her life.
When love and obsession collide, Loren stands in the center of the storm. Can she find the courage to defeat her inner demons, or will her fear and shame consume her?
Wheeler 
The second one is way better. The first one made me think, “yep, I don’t want to take the time to read that”. It was way over the top dramatic. Real life just isn’t like that unless you go the drama queen route (and that’s not meant to be gender specific).
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Thanks! While the first and the second basically say the same thing, it’s amazing how just a few tweaks can change the entire perspective.
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Exactly right, and that’s spooky for me because I write how I think… I think that’s bad.
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